CD 21 & Hubby Love

Well it seems as if the trigger is finally coming out of my system... I did an OPK yesterday and today and they were both negative. I've been doing pretty good lately, although these past two days I've been dealing with allergies and loose stools (TMI, sorry). I'm not reading too much into that, however. I've also been surprisingly calm these last few days, like no worries. What a nice change of pace. :) I woke up from a late nap a few hours ago, and I feel a little feverish, though my temp is normal. I hope I'm not coming down with anything. I made a promise to myself not to consume any alcohol while in this 2WW (if I can even call it that, since my chart still has no spike), but funny how I've been craving coffee recently. I've had it pretty much every day this week. I told hubby how ironic that I've sworn off alcohol, yet I'm still drinking coffee. I'm going to try and stop that too. (But this cold weather makes me want to enjoy a nice hot cup.) I haven't had any today, YAY! I am excited that next week I will be able to test. I am counting down the days.

In other news, DH has been seriously stressing about our future. I have to admit, we have had to deal with alot on our plate recently. But it's weird because it's usually me that's stressed out and here I am trying to reassure hubby that all is going to be okay. He started his spring semester in school this week and he's taking three classes plus working full time. Also, I still haven't found steady work. I mean, I've picked up two extra days of PT work, but we are still trying to recover, financially, from my recent lay-off. And now, we just found out that our house needs a little work on it too. Plus on top of everything we are dealing with IF. After his first two days of class, he came home pretty overwhelmed with all the expectations of his courses. I told him that now that I have more time on my hands I can help him out. After all, I've been in school pretty much most of my life, so I know what and what not to do. I don't like seeing him stressed like this, especially when I'm trying to be positive and optimistic about this cycle. But I think with the pressure of perhaps bringing a baby into the picture he feels very overwhelmed. I understand it's a lot to deal with at one time, but like I explained to hubby, we just need to take one thing at a time. I used a metaphor with him last night when trying to explain things. I said...

It's like putting mayo in your sandwich... If you scoop a spoonful of mayo and plop it on a slice of bread, you're not expected to eat it like that. Yes, of course it seems like alot... but that's if your planning on biting into it like that. And who would do that, certainly not you and me. You have to spread it out the bread slice. Right? That way what seemed like alot at first is now spread out evenly in each bite. I told him that's how we have to approach our issues right now. Yes, we've had a lot to deal with in these past few weeks, but you'd be insane to try and tackle it all at once. You need to deal with these things slowly and with care, making sure to spread it out over time. Yes, I'm not making nearly as much money as I was with my FT job, but I'm still working... I'm still bringing in money. I've got three jobs. I work 3 days a week and I just found out I may be picking up another job (more about that later). Yes, your classes may seem hard at first, but remember, you have your weekends free to study. Plus I will help you out. I'm a pro at these classes. They are what I live through everyday (he's taking Human Anatomy & Physiology and Medical Terminology), I can help you with studying. I can make it seem less difficult. Work, unfortunately can't change. Yes, they are stressing you out over there. But you are only human, you can't be expected to do EVERYTHING. I know you usually try to and that's what makes you such a good, hard working man. But remember, you are not dedicated to this place and you may be soon leaving in a few months if our plans stay on track. Just grin and bear it. Sometimes that's all you can do. The house needs a little work, yes, but we can tackle that gradually. It doesn't all need to be fixed in one day. Slow and steady wins the race. And finally IF... who knows if this cycle will be successful. Yes, this is the farthest we've come and yes, there is chance this may finally be the start of a new chapter. But again it's one day at a time. Babies early on don't require alot of spending. Thank goodness we've decided to cloth diaper and we've already purchased a bassinett. I'm an avid supporter of breastfeeding for the first year, and hopefully I won't have any problems with it. That also will save us money. We both have very supportive families and if it ever comes down to it, I'm sure they can lend a helping hand if need be. I somehow have this feeling that things will turn out okay. I think that's why I've been so calm lately. Maybe it's pregnancy hormones, who knows! (Wishful thinking) But we are here and surviving just fine. Carpe diem. Tomorrow will bring different opportunities, so you just have to take it one day at a time. Times like this will only strengthen our bond and bring us closer together. I love you forever and always.

Blessings in Disguise

So today was my meeting with a potential employer.  We met over lunch.  The meeting went really well and he was impressed with my work history and experience.  The meeting lasted longer than we both expected, but in a good way :)  He basically hired me on the spot, but needed to run things through with his accountant, doctor, and office manager.  Company is pretty new to the area and staff is kinda small.  He said work would only be part-time with FT potential in the future.  I told him that was perfect, since right now I'm only looking for PT.  We discussed networking together since we have a couple of the same connections.  I walked out of our meeting feeling really good.

Since I was in the area, I decided to stop by one of the doc's office I worked at with my other company.  They have half-days on Friday, so I caught them just in time as they were locking up.  Doc wasn't aware the extent of the company issues, and I explained that alot of us were laid off.  He and I had developed a good comraderie, so I was pretty open about it with him.  I told him I'd keep in touch since I'm pretty sure he will still need some of the services I provide.  Plus he is one of my personal medical providers so I'm sure, I'm gonna want to stay in contact.  He and his staff were sad to see me go, but hopefully we can work something out.  I gave them all hugs.

On my way to pick up a couple of movies for this weekend, I got a call from the office manager/co-executive of the potential employer from today.  She was really nice and we hit it off immediately.  She works in a different city, but works from her home doing insurance billing, scheduling appointments, and basically running the office with what she can.  Turns out that she used to work for my old company as well and left them just a little over a month ago after deciding not to return from maternity leave.  Now she's a SAHM and tries to work from her home as much as possible.  We both knew about each other, but never met.  Funny how things work out.  So our phone conversation lasted over an hour and we spoke about a multitude of things.  Like I said, we really took to each other.  She too was impressed with my knowledge and expertise.  She said I'd make an excellent addition to the company.  I also discovered that she is on the comittee that runs the board exams and education for my field of work.  I haven't been very active with that society since they collect annual dues and plus I didn't have alot of time to dedicate to it.  However, I thought that with her connection, it would be an excellent opportunity for me to jump into the educational aspect of what I do.  Already, I will be meeting with the program director at one of the colleges that offers degree programs in my field.  So with this new connection, I am thinking of doing some teaching work on the side (and also try to put in to work as a board examiner) as well as get clinical experience with the new job.  I think it would offer the perfect balance.  It still doesn't help the issue of getting FT benefits like medical insurance.  We still have a few months to figure it out and hopefully we can work out something to get on DH's company's insurance.  We'll see.  I'm not worried about it at the moment.  So I'm super excited to start this new venture and I'm on cloud 9 right about now.

Finally, I called my doc's office to inquire about the self pay services since I still plan on going next Wed for my monitoring.  I don't know why I thought that it would be hugely expensive, and I was waiting for the blow.  As it turns out, they provide a 20% discount for office visits for cash paying patients!  So that's really good.  Plus I would get $100 off the u/s cost.  She quoted me $120 for the office visit and $100 for the u/s, so I'd be out of pocket $220 for that day.  Not bad, I can deal with that.  So again I'm super excited and optimistic.  Please don't let me down follies.  That's all I need, another let down to add to my crappy holiday news.  Keeping FX!  Will update soon.

Look what came in the mail the other day.  50 pk OPK and 3pk digital HPTs.  Yay for TTC!  :p lol

CD 7 and Pic Share

Well today is CD7 and I just took my last dose of Clomid for this cycle.  Now we wait and see what follies will brew.  The Crazies have simmered down some and I feel a little more myself.  Still no job, but it's only been a week.  I have a meeting with a potential employer tomorrow, so I will update on that later.  I feel pretty decent, considering I've been laid off.  I mean, I still have my 5 hours a week Saturday job and hopefully soon, the unemployment benefits will kick in.  I'm remaining pretty optimistic that I will find something soon.  Also called one of the community colleges that offers programs in my field and the director sounded interested in what I had to offer.  So I should be meeting with her in a couple of weeks as well.  DH and I discussed me perhaps working part-time.  I think this would be better for us to adapt after LO comes.  I don't know where that will leave us financially, but I don't want to stress too much about it.  I think we can manage a couple of years until hubby finishes school.  Also I think I've decided not to go with the COBRA insurance after all.  It's really expensive and the lower premiums have high deductibles, that I might as well just pay cash instead.  Plus we may only be needing it for a month or two.  I don't know what my prescriptions will cost, but again not too worried about it.  But I'm going to try and use a drug savings card.  I didn't work out today.  I'm kinda just taking it easy and relaxing this week.  I promised myself I'd start next week if not this weekend.  Other than that just waiting on CD13 when I will get the u/s.  I will be calling my doc's office tomorrow and getting quotes for self pay.  No real update. Same old, same old.

Until next time, I want to leave you with this pic one of the gals on TB found.  I needed a little laugh.

New Year Off to Bad Start :(





On Friday evening (two days ago)  I got news that I was laid off effective immediately.  My company shut down due to recent changes in Medicare/Medicaid legislative cuts.  After finding out via a mandatory company teleconference, I was a hormonal mess.  JC was at work and I got to only speak to him briefly.  I was alone to deal with the impact.  Immediately, I texted a few of my close girlfriends to tell them what was up and that I may be MIA for a while.  Last year I was laid off from the same company due to other reasons, and the changes put me into a slight depression.  So I was expecting the same this time around as well.

 

I know it may be a little early to worry but with all that was going on in TTC life, I was pretty upset.  I didn't know where this would put us.  Our insurance was covered under me and with the job loss, I now won't have any medical insurance.  The COBRA premium is to costly for us to afford and hubby's insurance is also very expensive.  What has made this news even worse, was I just had started my cycle the previous evening.  I was so happy, and so excited (as you read in my previous blog) to start the new cycle.  The morning of the layoff, before receiving the news, I  had scheduled all my appointments for monitoring and picked up my new prescriptions for this second medicated cycle.  That excitement was short lived, as you could have expected, when I received Friday's sad news.

 

I'm still kind of in shock from the news and decided I really couldn't do anything until the new year started (which is in a few days).  With the upcoming holiday, and with everything being closed, I decided that Wednesday, Jan 2nd is when I would start putting in calls to previous employers and filing for unemployment.  Hubby and I discussed if we should move forward or not with this TTC cycle, and we both decided that yes, we would since I already had paid for the meds.  If it happens and I get a BFP, we would deal with it when the time came.  In the meantime, hubby will continue working and still plan on resuming his classes this coming semester.  I have already applied to several jobs online.  I am trying to remain optimistic that things will turn out okay.  I am still worried about our financial situation since bills will continue to come in.  I will try and stay focused on losing weight, especially now that I am no longer employed.  I can dedicate this free time to staying dedicated to my weight loss.

 

That is all for now.  I will leave you with a pic of all the meds I'm on since TTC.  I am still amazed that I take this many pills just so that I can try to get pregnant.  From not taking anything, having no medical illness up until this year when diagnosed with PCOS...  to now taking  7 meds.  These include cabergoline, levothyroxine, metformin, progesterone, clomid, prenatal vitamins, and HCG.  I used to also take prednisone when first diagnosed.  But they took me off that when they saw that wasn't helping any.  You can also see my weekly pill organizer and see what I'm taking daily.  This also varies week to week, depending on where I'm at in my cycle.

 

 

So here's to a new year and a new beginning....

 

Hello Eggs... Are you there?

Well it's been about 4 months since my last blog and alot has happened since then...
We are finally settled into our little home and things are running smoothly.  We renovated our kitchen 1st thing after we moved in and it took us about 2 weeks to get most of it done.  We enlisted help from my brother in law and a friend of his.  JC took 2 weeks off work to help work on the kitchen.  We got most of it done, but to date, it still remains partially unfinished.  Oh well, we'll be working on it slowly.
Then we kind of held off on baby-making for a few weeks because I decided to get carpal release surgery done on my right hand.  I wanted to make sure I wasn't pregnant for the surgery as well as the few weeks following when I would be using pain meds.  So we used protection.

Then at the end of November, I got laid off and that got things really spinning out of control.  I've been looking for work non-stop for over a month.  And even though I'm collecting unemployment, it still frustrates me that I can't find work.  For the mean time, we are okay on our finances, but I've been in a funk lately and I just sit around the house all day and watch TV.

I also recently got back on my prenatal vitamins (which I had lapsed on for a few months), I started my provera dose this week so that I can menstruate, and I'm going back on the progesterone cream 12 days after I get my period.  I'm hoping this will kickstart my hormone system.

I made my new years resolution to lose weight so that we can finally make a baby, but I haven't had the motivation to get off my ass and start my weight loss regimen.  I'm sad to say, that I'm probably the biggest I've ever been in my life.  It's depressing.  And now that I actually have the time to dedicate solely to weight loss, I can't even lift a finger.

Well today, I did my 1st workout, and boy did it hurt.  I know I didn't burn enough calories (meaning I consumed more calories than I could burn) and that's a bit dissappointing, but I figured baby steps are better than jumping into a program too fast and burning out too fast.  Tomorrow, I want to try and wake up early and do a work out routine so I can catch up.  My plan is to workout morning and afternoon and eat more calorie-concious.  I need to lose this weight and the baby itch is getting worse and worse... although maybe it's a good thing I'm not pregnant since I have no healthcare and no job.  Plus I don't want to be an obese pregnant lady, because I want the natural child birth and I don't want any complications.  I need to focus....

So here's hoping things change soon and I can change my outlook on life.... me being the optimistic person that I am still have that glimmer of hope that things will change for the better.  Cheers!